Friday, August 26, 2011

I talk Fashion

As of late, I have felt the urge to start dressing for success...ing (the phrase really felt like it should rhyme). Well, every powerful looking woman wears a pair of kick-butt heels. So, I've put away my ever beloved Toms (Note from the hipster in me: I totally wore Toms before everyone else) and I've been on the hunt for heels.
It's a disaster.
First off, I can barely stay balanced in a pair of tennis shoes. Put a 3 inch chopstick under that shoe? There is no way I'm walking without support. It's embarrassing.

So, I went shopping today with my little tis, who is quite the fashionista, hoping she could guide me. Instead, she informed me that there are a few tragic trends going on right now.

First off: THE CLOG
No. Absolutely not. Unless you plan on heading up to the alps soon to go a yodel-lodel-ing, then these CANNOT be cute!
who doesn't want their feet to look bigger?

Second: Flares
Until the world becomes really good at roller-disco, there is no need for this unflattering little beauties. Now they would look great if we all looked like this:
are those clogs peeking under at me?

But, the majority of people don't have legs that are mistaken telephone poles. So, this is what the rest of us look like:
In those pants are a fold out chair, laptop computer, and the population of Mexico city.

Which brings me to the fashions I wish were coming back in... or coming in for the first time

Tattoo Choker Necklaces

Like having a bad tattoo... only more itchy.

The Rachel
I really feel like I missed out on this trend, and I'd like it to come back while I've still got hair

Giant Sweatshirts

Like this, only in an XXXXXL Large. I''m convinced if I keep wearing them like I do the world is bound to catch on

In other news, I'm bored out of my mind.

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