Tuesday, September 25, 2012

I saw it on Pinterest!

This post was inspired by a ridiculous mom-pin I saw posted on Pinterest yesterday.

What is a mom pin? It is a ridiculous craft that delusional newly married girls post thinking that someday they will be such a perfect mom that they will have time to sew their little girls's dresses out of old tshirts, frame their own photography in frames made of spoons, and make cupcakes that look like pandas every night  all while trying to take care of a child.

The pin that inspired was simple enough. It was a list of cute "how to's" for cute moms. At the top of the list? Stickers to put on apples that have cute messages for the kids like "I love you," or "Have a good day" or  "You are superior to the kid eating the PB&J sandwich not cut in the shape of a heart." I imagine the mom who made these stickers must be a blonde, into yoga, rich, emotion-free, hasn't-eaten-sugar-in-ten-years, wears heels on the treadmill kind of lady.


You are not going to have time to make your kids little apple-stickers with love notes on them. You are not going to have time to cut their sandwiches into the shape of their favorite animal. You will be lucky if you have enough time to pack them a lunch, write them a note, or sleep at night. Heck, I have zero children and I don't have time to pack a lunch now. These crafts and DIYs are ridiculous. 

That is my rant.

In the mean time, I tried to find this particular pin, and accidentally spent an hour on Pinterest and created a new board.

Pinterest is the devil. Excuse me while I go put a cut up sock to put in my hair. 

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Running... er... speedwalking

I was trying to convince my sister to do a 5k with me. She obviously misses me a lot, because she was so elated about the thought of seeing me again that she agreed to sign up, completely forgetting that both of us are incapable of running.

3 miles didn't really seem that long until I learned that I could only run for about 10 minutes at a time before I wanted to walk again. I knew I had a lot of working out to do before running the whole 5k was a reality for me. 

I downloaded a couch to 5k podcast (5k101.com was my personal choice) and I got my butt out of bed every morning to get my workout done for the day. 

Finally, after a month of working at it, I started running for 30 minutes straight. I was a stinking runner! YEAH! I knew I had my olympic-track-coach-grandpa's genes in me somewhere! I was feeling pretty great about this until a comment I got a week or so ago...

I was walking around the WB lot when I was stopped by a guy about my age.  I had seen him around, and we always said hi to each other, but we'd never really spoken. He was cute, and I was actually a little excited that he was talking to me.

"Hey! I think I saw you on Chandler this morning!" - Him
"Probably, I live around there" - Me
"I think I saw you speedwalking or something."
"Ha, if you saw me walking, I was probably normal walking...." Nervous giggle. Walk away.
Awkward end to the conversation, but I was hopeful that this guy was very confused on what a jog is. Just to test my speed, I decided to head over to the gym and run on the treadmill to see how fast I was actually going.

It was slow... very slow.

So, while I thought I looked like Jennifer Garner on Alias (I just barely discovered this show and I'm obsessed with it, but I now realize after 20 minutes searching on youtube for ONE video of Jennifer Garner running on the show that this reference is completely irrelevant. If it ain't on youtube, it don't matter ) I look more like... 

Hopefully my sister is doing better...

Monday, September 10, 2012

My Tiny Cellphone - A Love Affair

I started writing this particular post back in May, back when I had a Sony Ericson Walkman. You don't know what that is? FOR SHAME!

This phone was amazing!
  It played music. Unfortunately, you needed a special cable to hook the phone to your computer to upload any music, so I never added anything new, which was okay because it came with the only song I ever really needed to listen to: Love in This Club by Usher. (dripping with sarcasm)

We regularly took photos together

  It was tiny. It easily fit in my bra without anyone noticing, except when I awkwardly pulled it out to answer it... (why do they even add pockets to jackets or pants if they're FAKE! I digress... that's another rant for another day. The point of that sentence was to clarify why I wasn't using pockets to hold my phone) I'm certain this phone was the inspiration for the cellphones in Zoolander

I had one of these babies for most of my cellphone-owning-life.

Wait... I should clarify. Each of the 9 phones I owned in college was a Sony Ericson Walkman. Each phone was unique, and was tied to specials memories, events, and people (boys). Just like the memories, each phone met its tragic end in a uniquely different way.

1. Water damage... from salty water... from my eyes.. otherwise known as tears. Yup. I cried so much during a conversation with my mom about the woes of my freshman year that my phone gave up the ghost.

2. Freshman year brings out the otherwise controlled stupidity of all 19 year old kids. For me, it was the day I decided to showcase my fun and spontaneous nature by jumping into a swimming pool in November fully clothed, cell phone in pocket. No one thought I was cool, and I no longer had a phone to cry on when I talked to my mom about my lack of cool-ness

3. Did I mention how small these guys are? They even fit in pipes! I learned that after I flushed one down the toilet. It survived for a short time. I knew it was alive because I could hear it vibrating for a good two minutes until we were able to get it out. It died shortly after

4. Dropped once or twice... or 15 times.

5. Left in a hotel room in Florence, Italy

6. Fell on my face with my phone in my pocket... the damage left both the phone and my pride permanently scarred.

7. Fell out of my pocket on Big Thunder Mountain. No good hearted Disneyland-er ever gave it back.

8. My dad gave me a new one for Christmas, assuming that I'd have already broken my last phone... which I didn't, but I decided to put one phone to rest to start using the new Christmas phone

9. After 2 months in LA, I realized that life without an iphone was not going to work for the people out here. After a genius plan to fooled my father into agreeing that I should get an iphone, I finally laid my last walkman down to rest.

On the only anniversary I've ever had with a phone. I'm serious when I say it was a love affair
Even though I am an iphone owner now, my baby sized phone will always be my first love, and you never forget your first.

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Movin' on up

I am the Dubs PA on Conan.

This is the normal reaction.

"Ah! What? How exciting! I'm so happy for you... That's great that you're... uh... what do you do?"

My mom seems to call me every other day asking me to explain my job to her again.

Basically, I take each act of the show (each act is broken up by commercials) and edit them together, I make a bunch of copies, then I give those copies to 10 people around the office. I archive the show, and make sure it's saved in 3 places. That's about it.

I also work with all the old shows. My first week in, I had to go back and find scenes from shows recorded on giant VHS like tapes from the 90s. I have to use this machine

I pulled stills to highlight characters played by one of our amazing writers, Brian McCann. It was his last day.

While it doesn't look like I did a lot, I was SO excited to have something I helped create be on the show.