Wednesday, July 16, 2014

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Sunday, March 30, 2014

Goodbye, Dear Friend

I've been debating all day whether or not I wanted or even was capable of writing this post.

This week, we said goodbye to my dog, Dallas.

We were lucky enough to have Dallas for around 13 years. This last week, I have been reminded of all these little memories we had together.

Like every little kid, I was convinced that she could secretly talk, and actually understood everything we said to her. That first week we brought her home, I remember sitting with her in the backyard and saying "Alright Dallas, if you can talk you should tell me now. I swear I won't tell anyone else." She, of course, didn't reply, but a part of me always hoped she would finally speak up.

I remember loving how fast she could run, and how her face would light up when we played with her outside. So, I'd head to the parking lot at the church across the street, make Dallas sit at one end of the parking lot while I rode my razor scooter to the other side. She always stayed, she was so obedient, and then I would shout "okay Dallas! Come here!" and she would race across to me.

My door didn't really latch close at home, and she could stick her nose through, and run and jump up on the bed. My mom always said she wasn't allowed up there, but Brooke and I didn't care.

I've always been very afraid of the dark, and of basements. But with Dallas, I could face my fears. Even when I was living at home two years ago, I couldn't face the ghosts of my basement without Dallas by my side.

In junior high, I struggled to fit in, and to make friends, but Dallas was always my friend. She was always excited to see me, and I depended on her greeting when I came home from school.

After I moved to california, the thing I missed most about Utah was my dog.

She used to wine with excitement whenever we asked if she wanted to go on a walk, and I especially loved taking her up the canyon.

This last Christmas, I took Dallas on our last walk together. She wasn't the puppy that joyfully bounded across the parking lot, nor did she jump with excitement at the prospect of going outside, but we walked. I'm so grateful for those last memories I got with her.

It's hard to describe what it's like to lose a dog to someone who has never had one. She might not have been a person, but she was family, and it's never easy to lose family. I know going home won't be the same without her.

Christmas 2012, we even tied a little christmas flower to her collar

Forced selfie last Christmas

My dad sent me this picture of her laying in her usual spot

Friday, January 24, 2014

Never Thought I Could Run

If you've known me a long time, then you know that I was not active when I was little. I had some serious asthma, and I was very overweight. I remember in elementary school, we had to run a mile. I was the last one to finish at over 16 minutes. In Junior high, I could not run for more than a minute or two without stopping to gasp for air. After Italy, things kind of started to change. I lived with a girl who had lost a lot of weight by running, and we started running together. Then my uncle started running and lost a lot of weight, and met some really cool friends.

Then my grandpa, an olympic track coach, started to get sick. It really shook everyone. His illness made me want to prove to myself, to him, and to my family that I had that same athletic blood in my body. Prove to myself that I wasn't that chubby little girl with asthma anymore.

In July, my best friend Jo agreed to sign up for the Disneyland Tinkerbell Half Marathon with me. I deactivated Facebook, so I could use these months to really focus on improving, and not compare myself to everyone else. I didn't miss a single training run until I got sick over Christmas Break. I lifted weights, I ate healthier, and I ran at least 3 days a week.
Finally, last weekend, the day came.
Bright and early! We were up at 4:00 am. Then we missed the bus, and had to wake my dad up so he would drive us. Oops! But there were fireworks, and THOUSANDS of people there (just to give you an idea, our bibs were in the 12,000s, and we were NOT the last people.
We ran through California and then Disneyland. It was AMAZING! We stopped to take a lot of pictures 

apparently, that's my go to pose...

Trying to switch up our poses...

After mile 6, you leave the parks, and things get rough (no, it didn't take use 2 hours to get to mile 6, we were in the last corral, so we didn't get to start until almost an hour after the race had officially started)

This is the moment I saw my parents and Ryan standing near the finish line. I LOVED HAVING THEM THERE SO MUCH! Seriously, it meant the world to see them there. I was exhausted, but so proud, and it was so great to share that moment with them

I DID IT! My goals were to run fast enough that I still had time to take as many pictures as I wanted, never take an unscheduled walking break, and finish in under three hours. Guess what my time was? 2:59:10 hahaha! Made the last goal by 50 seconds. I finished in about the average time it took someone to finish the race, so I was in like 7,000 place. I don't even care. I loved (nearly) every second of this, even the parts that were hard and maybe a little boring. I had worked so hard, and I felt great. I'm ready to sign up for my full marathon (ok, maybe I need to get a few more half marathons under my belt first).

PS - Remember how I said I wanted to prove to myself that I wasn't that chubby little girl with asthma anymore? I should mention that as soon as I got my medal, I couldn't breath, and had to go to the medical tent to get an inhaler... Oops! We bonded with the medical staff though. After I got a lecture about how I should always have an inhaler on me, they were so nice.

So maybe I am still that chubby little girl with asthma, but that doesn't mean that I'm can't do whatever I want to do.

Too cheesy? I don't even care.

Thursday, January 23, 2014

Never too late to write about Christmas

Every time I decide to write a blog post, I forget how to share the pictures from my phone, and the post is delayed for weeks. Oh the struggle!

December was the most wonderful month!
Look at this little cutie! No, I didn't make this. I got it from Nothing Bundt Cakes.

I got to plan my first event!!! It was a cast screening for Saving Mr. Banks in Downtown Disney. Everything went really well, and I was prepared for how cold I get at night here. I realize the rest of America is actually freezing... but I was so cold.

That's right. I went snowboarding. Last time I went I was probably about 12 years old, and I hated it. But I was a super chubby kid, and had no athletic ability. In the last couple years I've lost some weight and I've gotten into working out, so I decided it was time to give it another try. Loved it!
My sweet dad was so patient with me. I was too terrified to go fast, so I rode the edge of my board all the way down the mountain.
I should also mention, there was one round where I freaked out about getting off the lift and ended up riding the lift back down the mountain. I'd rather snowboard off a little cliff than face that humiliation again. Everyone going the opposite direction just stares at you, and every once in a while makes fun of you. Then, once you're at the bottom, they have to stop the ENTIRE lift, so you can awkwardly limp off to the side.

White elephant at the Borup's this year was impressive. Probably the most impressive gifts so far. I got a pan and a pascal tape dispenser, which is perfect, because I like to pretend I'm rapunzel

Christmas break mostly revolved around this little puppy. 

Getting creative with Snapchat
On New Years Eve, we had a Alice in Wonderland themed mystery party. I had a blast, and I think all these kids are perfect.

Is she the CUTEST? She loved my dress, and decided that she would lay on the back of it to color.  

My best intern friend Meg LEFT!!! Saddest part of my life right here. She was basically the only person that I hung out with all semester. I do not know what I'm going to do at Disney without her!

And finally, took a trip to San Francisco with a new friend to visit an old friend. It's crazy how the world is so small! Ashley is in my ward here, and she was roommates with Marci, who was in my study abroad! (If you're wondering why this is the coolest picture I have of San Fran, that's because I got sick and spent the day in bed...)
Marcie was leaving this week to move to the other side of the country, so we had to take the trip to drive up to see her while we could. (ps- she moved to the city with no job, and got her ideal job the next day. Are you as impressed as I am?)

Things are starting to really fit together here now. I miss Utah and my family everyday, but it's getting easier.